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01.Feb.09

Iker Pérez

Alleged GoldenEye XBLA achievement list hits the net

Check out the tasks you won’t ever do to get 200 Gamer Points

A couple of days ago, newsblog Destructoid unveiled a list of 12 achievements allegedly designed to be part of the cancelled remake of GoldenEye 007 for the Xbox Live Arcade. They claim that their source, identified only as Mr Chips, even showed them photographs and diagrams of the achievements, yet there is no official way to confirm that they actually belong to GoldenEye. Still, the names certainly refer to the Bond franchise and they amount to a total of 200 Gamer Points just as any other Xbox Live Arcade title. In addition, they are written following the British spelling rules, so chances are that they actually come from somewhere in Twycross.

Not everything is wine and roses, though. Had these achievements made their way to the game, many GoldenEye fans may have felt disappointed with them. Only one of them – Sprinter – looks actually challenging, while all the others should mean no problem to any experienced old-school gamer out there.

Q-Branch – (10G) Unlock a cheat – beat the target time on any level
00 Agent – (25G) Complete the game on Secret Agent Difficulty
Bullet Proof – (5G) Complete a level having collected all the body armour
Sprinter – (30G) Complete the game from start to finish in less than an hour
Slapper – (10G) Complete a level without firing a shot and having killed 5 guards
Agent – (5G) Complete a level on any difficulty
Bullet Shy – (20G) Complete a level without getting hit.
Secret Agent – (15G) Complete the game on Agent difficulty
License to Kill – (10G) Complete any level having killed more than 50 guards.
Dual Wield – (5G) Dual wield any weapon.
Munitions Expert – (15G) Complete a level having hit enemies with more than 300 shots.
007 – (40G) Complete the game on 00 Agent difficulty.

So instead of this rather dull list, we made out our own in case Rare is interested on picking up some ridiculous ideas for the uncertain future. Here’s our two cents:

Blunt Instrument – (10G) Complete the game on Agent difficulty.
Shaken, Not Stirred – (20G) Complete the game on Secret Agent difficulty.
Bond, James Bond – (30G) Complete the game on 00 Agent difficulty.
Nobody Does It Better – (40G) Beat the target time on every level.
Goldfingers – (5G) Complete a level using all controller configurations.
Open the Hatch – (5G) Unlock the Silo roof gates.
May I Have Your Luggage – (5G) Get Ourumov’s briefcase.
The Property of a Lady – (5G) Steal Xenia’s RC-P90 and Grenade Launcher.
A View to a Kill – (5G) Find the island on Dam.
Allied Assault – (5G) Get double AR-33.
You Only Live Once – (10G) Kill Baron Samedi for real.
Do Not Spam – (5G) Find the Rare logo on Depot.
The Woman With the Golden Gun – (10G) Complete Jungle without letting Natalya kill any bad guys.
Inside Job – (5G) Kill Duncan Botwood using Ken Lobb.
Deleted Scenes – (5G) Get the alternate ending on Depot.
Live and Let Die – (10G) Finish a multiplayer game without ever being hit.
The Living Daylights – (5G) Finish a multiplayer game with only one life bar left.
For England, James – (10G) Kill Alec Trevelyan before finishing the game without failing any mission.
James Bond Will Not Return – (5G) Make Bond miss the helicopter on Cradle without failing the mission.